Friday, October 31, 2008

Open letter, part 3

Dear Mr. Tolan,

Hope you had a Happy Halloween. Don't forget to set your clocks this weekend.

Another reason why I would be a great writers' assistant:

I don't drink. Ever. At all. I will never come to work with a hangover. I will never not come to work hung over. I'm always happy to be a designated driver. And I'm not judgmental about other people drinking. Okay, I am, but that's only because I care. And usually, I keep it to myself so long as no one's liver is screaming.

Good night,

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In summing up, I wish I had some kind of affirmative message to leave you with. I don't. Would you take two negative messages?
-- Woody Allen