Saturday, February 7, 2009

#5 and #6

5. You could fall for a guy who is completely inappropriate for you, is out of your league, smokes, and...sigh.

6. There could be a major earthquake while you are:

a. giving birth
b. suffering from diarrhea
c. on the ramp that brings you from the 10 West to the 405 South
d. about to win your first-ever game of Operation
e. about to receive your Oscar from (whoever you fantasize about here)
f. swimming/diving
g. on an amusement park ride, specifically roller coaster or Ferris Wheel
h. landing your plane
i. getting on an elevator
j. giving/getting a blow job
k. tripping on acid under a bridge
l. feeding the sharks at the aquarium
m. hiking in Griffith Park
n. in a gas station next to a fuel truck
o. in the shower
p. landing after jumping out of a plane
q. treetrimming/in a treehouse
r. working near/on power/phone lines
s. bungee jumping
t. taking down/putting up a circus tent
u. moshing
v. kissing your dead grandfather's forehead for the last time
w. setting off fireworks
x. in the middle of giving/getting surgery/dental cleaning/tattoo
y. five minutes before that night's episode of Lost ends
z. painting your masterpiece on a rickety easel

No comments:

In summing up, I wish I had some kind of affirmative message to leave you with. I don't. Would you take two negative messages?
-- Woody Allen