11:20pm J Lo's thinking, and how does JHud have an Oscar when I pulled out all the stops for Selena?
11:22pm Bored. I just killed an ant. Not out of boredom. Coincidence that. Beyonce's eyelashes. Sigh. Let's move this along. I already saw this movie, and it's friggin 11:23pm. I am glad JHud is in a better dress. Why isn't that guy in the suit Jamie Foxx? What, is he too good to not be in the spotlight?
11:25pm OK, Beyonce brought it. But does anyone want it, at this hour? Seriously, even the unimportant little brother from Dreamgirls is up there. Foxx, where are you?
11:26 pm I'm all out of "Patience."
11:28pm Why is Travolta presenting? He hasn't been in a good movie since a billion years ago. Because of Hairspray? Smile, Mark O'Donnell, your film's going to do good B.O.
11:29pm Seriously. Etheridge? Well, whatever. Shout out to Al Gore!
NO MORE COMMERCIALS. Just let's finish. Please!